Indicators That Barack Obama Will Legalize Anabolic Steroids
November 10, 2008 by Millard Baker
There is hope for anabolic steroid users that U.S. President-Elect Barack Obama will legalize the non-medical use of steroids shortly after he is inaugurated. Of course, the actual likelihood is slightly greater than “a snowball’s chance in hell,” but one can find indicators (albeit extremely tenuous) to suggest that Obama would support such a change in steroid laws.
(1) Barack Obama thinks the federal government is spending way too much time on anabolic steroids.
The logical solution would be to remove anabolic steroids from the controlled substances list freeing up government resources for the more serious concerns faced by our nation.
“We’ve got nuclear weapons and a financial meltdown to worry about. We shouldn’t be worrying about steroids as much as I think sometimes we do.”
(2) Barack Obama selected Rahm Emanuel as his White House Chief of Staff.
Rahm Emanuel is the brother of Ari Emanuel. Ari Emanuel is the founder of the Endeavor Agency in Beverly Hills, California. Ari Emanuel’s agency is one of the most powerful of the “big five” entertainment agencies in Hollywood.
Most importantly is the fact that Ari Emanuel is the superagent that represents director Christopher Bell. Chis Bell directed the steroid documentary “Bigger Stronger Faster*” which advocates a rational re-evaluation of anabolic steroids and arguably supports the case for steroid law reform.
Perhaps this will lead to a private White House screening of “Bigger Stronger Faster*”?
(3) Barack Obama has implied that his new Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel actually uses anabolic steroids.
Barack Obama was joking when he made the steroid suggestion at a 2005 Roast of Rahm Emanuel who was then a Democratic Congressman from Illinois. Obama further joked that Emanuel possesses many of the stereotypical characteristics of an anabolic steroid user.
Rahm is a little intense, he is strong, he is aggressive, he is emotional, he is moody and the Republicans have finally figured out one way to control him: they are going to start steroid testing members.
Furthermore, Rahm Emanuel is nicknamed “Rahmbo” after the Rambo character played by Sylvester Stallone who is an outspoken advocate of anabolic steroid use and proponent of human growth hormone use. “Rahmbo” is also an ultra-competitive athlete who competes in triathlons and marathons.
(4) Finally, screenwriter and alleged steroid user Tyler Perry is producing a biographical movie adaptation of Barack Obama’s life.
Tyler Perry allegedly obtained steroids from chiropractor Michael Diamond at the upscale Manhattan Gym called Clay; Dr. Diamond is said to have received steroids on behalf of celebrities that were prescribed by Gary Brandwein and shipped by Signature Pharmacy. After his name was publicly leaked in the Signature Pharmacy steroid scandal, Perry had dinner with Barack and Michelle Obama and subsequently decided to write a love story about the future President and First Lady.
I’m not sure how, but the possibility that a steroid-fueled Tyler Perry is making a movie about Barack Obama bodes wells for steroid legalization.
I was just watching him in the debate with Hillary and meeting him and Michelle and having dinner with them. They just inspired this amazing story. It’s a love story with a little political twist but it’s mostly about…it’s called “For the Love of You” and it’s about his love for his woman. It’s going to be amazing.
So, President-Elect Barack Obama thinks the government spends too much time on steroids, selects top adviser whose brother represents a film about steroid use, implies his top adviser uses anabolic steroids, and has dinner with a purported steroid user who is making a movie about Obama.
What does this mean for the future of anabolic steroid law reform? Well, most likely absolutely nothing. But it was fun to examine the interconnectedness between Obama and the steroid issue!
